First of all, even though our 2nd draft is still too short I feel we have included more interesting shots that are helping to build more of a narrative.
The footage we filmed down in the graveyard made us realise that our original title Nightmares didn't fit with the footage we had; we found a cherub statue at the end of a grave and got some ideas of how Madeleine could become possessed by touching it and so the title Fallen Angels would make more sense. I think we had a good range of shots, but need to include more establishing ones as this will look more professional and to a higher standard. We also need to re-shoot the panning shot of the graveyard as it doesn't run smoothly enough to get a clear picture of what the shot includes and generally isn't good quality.
In terms of inter-titles, I think the ghost like glow around the text makes it look particularly conventional to horror films and therefore helps set the genre for the audience. But I don't think the font looks quite right and we need to work on the transitions (we had an idea to have one moving one way and the second line moving the other).
The possession shots with the dips to black looks effective and having the really short cut to the cherub getting closer and closer in between shows the cause of the possession. We 're going to flash this up more as we get more footage for the final draft, so throughout the trailer the angel will make an appearance before her 'blackouts' (possessions).
So overall we need to get more narrative especially and this will come from getting more footage in town (where we can do more establishing shots within this too) and to record more voice-overs or a short conversation which will help explain the narrative to the audience.
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